April 26
Seeking Scotland travel advice (couple of specific questions)
Question 1. Regarding Perth and Dunfermline.
Question 2. Regarding Wigtown. [more inside]
Flippin’ saturators, man/how do they work?
I’m on the part of my home recording journey where I’ve started looking into GarageBand plug-ins. How do I use a saturator and/or spring reverb? [more inside]
At home laser hair removal
Are the at-home laser hair removal devices any good? [more inside]
Weird dynamic I always find myself in. How to stop?
I’m working as part of a group, or have been asked to help a group of people with something. Everyone else seems to know what to do and springs into action. I’m not sure, so I ask someone how I can help, and people seem annoyed that I’m asking and tell me that my help isn’t needed. Then, the authority figure who assigned the work stops by and gets mad at me for slacking. [more inside]
I'm looking for a term or a phrase that may or may not exist
What is it called, when you have a process/method of doing something, that gets passed down, where it turns out that part of that process/method was due to limitations/situations at the time, and is not important to actual process of doing the thing at all? [more inside]
What is this person communicating?
Paying the lawyers from the grave
Have a question about a clause in an engagement letter, namely whether it's something like standard in the industry/my state [more inside]
Gendered and racialized terms of address
Did a Hofstadter write an essay satirizing "Ms." versus "Mrs."? [more inside]
What substance is this? I want to glue back together.
This objet d’art fell and the wings broke off. Curious as to what material it is so we can use the appropriate glue. It’s not plaster, is heavier than you’d expect. Is it resin? Zoom in for better detail. It glints in the sunlight. Link to photo
New music for Olds - technology question
Okay, explain this to me in tiny baby steps, like really "first plug in the cord"-level steps. I...need headphones for when I am doing chores. [more inside]
Where to donate used picnic/cooking stuff in LA
We'll be travelling from Seattle to LA in July-Aug, as per this question. Where in LA should we donate the gear we'll be buying for the trip and can't bring back to the UK? [more inside]
Seeking USB-C keyboard
Can anyone recommend a USB-C keyboard that feels nice to type on? This is for my Android-based e-reader.
Using a Bluetooth keyboard with it was glitchy, so I want something that is USB-C based (cable -- not dongle), and it's been harder to find this than I expected.
How to not get sick in Kathmandu. Challenge level: Health Anxiety
I'm travelling to Kathmandu for a three week stay in June. I've never really travelled to this part of the world and my health anxiety is starting to kick off in anticipation. Looking for some advice for things I can do to prepare the best I can to avoid sickness, especially of the stomach kind. [more inside]
How to navigate extreme moral disagreement in marriage
I fell in love with my husband in part because we shared anti-war values. It’s a topic that comes up often, especially given that he comes from an immigrant Israeli family (atheists, critical of Israel’s treatment of Palestinians). I am heartbroken and outraged by the Gaza war, he supports it. I’ve tried to manage this by avoiding the topic with him, but as time grinds on, I feel more and more confused as to who he is. Contempt and disgust are creeping in, and it is terrifying. What can I do? [more inside]
Is This A Factor In Choosing An Assisted Living Home For My Mother?
I have been looking for Assisted Living homes for my mother. How concerned should I be about the dingy external appearance of a location? [more inside]
Affordable, portable, high quality, self-adjusting projectors are real??
That's an open question! I met with a fancy client company this week, and the meeting involved use of an LG Cinebeam projector. It amazed me—I didn't realize the technology had come this far—and I'm curious if there's something more affordable that comes close on some of this model's features. [more inside]
April 25
Taylor Swift. I know *nothing* of her music. Start me out folkie maybe?
Here's my take: She looks like a plastic doll. She is massively, hugely, insanely popular; I don't know but my hallucination is that it's all teen girls. I have asked a few people in my milieu and gotten blank stares: "Oh, she's that billionaire." "Oh, she's pop music." (So are Be Theatles. So is Nirvana. etc) [more inside]
looking for specific cat meme with off brand kitty
meme features photo of two cats. one, very sleek, put together, labeled “dr pepper” — the other, similar colors, but a bit scraggly, bruisery, labeled “dr thunder.” google image search has been fruitless! help!
Time for a new wallet. Just like the old wallet, please.
A long, long time ago in a country far, far away, I bought a wallet. It needs replacing. I want it's twin, and can't find it. [more inside]
Home fermented fizzy raspberry drink?
I'm obsessed with BSA's raspberry sour, a non alcoholic beer that tastes like sour raspberries with a hint of beer or grain or something. I want to make something similar. [more inside]
Help me find a regionally specific Girl Scout song
I have vague memories of a song we sang as Mariner Scouts (the branch of Senior Girl Scouts that learned about sailing) in southern CA in the late 90s/early aughts. I can't find any record of its existence and it's driving me crazy. Lyrics fragment below the fold. [more inside]
A week in Yorkshire for walking...which town?
Hello, Yorkshire people! Can anyone recommend a small market town for me (68F New Englander) as a base for walking the heathery moors in late July? [more inside]
Where can I lie on a bed of nails?
What it says on the tin: I’d like to try lying on a bed of nails — either actual nails or plastic ones (as opposed to an acupressure mat). Preferably in PDX or NYC, but open to all U.S.! [more inside]
Plastic hair clog remover broke off in bathtub drain
The plastic hair clog removal tool I was using, similar to these, broke off in the bathtub drain. I believe the stopper is called a lift-and-turn type. How can I get the tool out? [more inside]
Looking for a list of legal terms for a speech to text dictionary
I have been using various speech to text tools in my legal practice (and personal life). Some of these tools allow you to upload a custom dictionary of words to improve accuracy. I'd like to upload a list of terms that are specific to U.S. legal practice, but I don't want the hard work of constructing that list myself. [more inside]
Help with vision insurance (UHC) — miscommunication.
I got my vision test from a provider who was explicitly listed on my vision insurance (United HealthCare), but who denied the service. I called UHC and spoke with an agent, who called the provider, who said they did not accept UHC. The agent was mystified and told me to go ahead and pay $99 out of pocket, and they would reimburse me $99 as the provider was considered in-network. [more inside]
What is Essence of Mereby?
An old book I’m reading mentions essence of mereby. I’ve never heard of this and I am looking for more information. [more inside]
I need travel insurance. I know nothing about it. Help?
Mr. DrGail and I have an international trip coming up in January, and should probably have travel insurance of some sort. Beyond that, I haven't a clue. [more inside]
What exactly does professional bookkeeping do for a small non-profit?
As a non-accounting person, I'm vaguely aware that accounting can be complicated. Since starting in my ED role about two months ago, though, I'm not sure that our operation is complicated enough to warrant what we spend for a large external accounting firm. This is not related to auditing, which is done separately.
Many more details about our specific circumstances inside. [more inside]
Grandboss doesn't like me because I'm quiet, now what?
Today, quite out of the blue, my grandboss strongly implied that he didn't like my personality. I have to work in close proximity with this dude on the regular. How to proceed? [more inside]
How to train myself out of double-spacing after a period?
As an elder millennial, I was trained to double-space after periods at the end of sentences. How do I train myself out of it? [more inside]
Is anything worth a long commute?
Continuing the job hunt and received a job interview invite for a job I'd be excited about, but I realized how bad of a commute it would be. Should I go through with the interview or give it up? What would make a long commute worth it to you? [more inside]
The wrong arm is numb
I wake up with a numb arm and hand. I sleep on my side but it's the top arm that's been going numb, not the one I lay on. [more inside]
How do you keep plastic tubs from flipping over in the dishwasher?
When I put plastic containers in the dishwasher, half the time they flip over and don't get fully washed or rinsed. What works well for you to keep that from happening? [more inside]
Exporting a video project to another editor -- which is easier to use?
Can I export a video file to a new editor that separates the text, audio, and video, picture files like when I am making my project originally? [more inside]
Window Blinds Hardware
I need to get a couple replacement brackets like this.
Is this possible?
Pass the Parcel: Small gifts for ages 4-8
For a birthday party, we're trying to come up with "pass the parcel" gifts (basically party favors distributed randomly such that each kid gets a random unique gift) for a group of 4-5 year olds and a few older siblings. [more inside]
Safer plastic water bottle and food storage containers
My relative wants to buy new food storage containers and a larger water bottle (64oz) for keeping water in refrigerator. She is concerned about plastics but can not use glass or stainless steel. I am looking for suggestions of the "safest"/"healthiest"plastic containers we could order. [more inside]
How reliable are portable HDs these days?
I have four large (but not full) hard drives on my desk that are getting old--two 4TB and two 3TB (one of each pair is a backup for the other). One drive holds media files and the other my Lightroom library. Given technology developments, I could fit all of my data on a single 5TB portable drive (I'd get a second for backups). Is this a bad idea, and should I just stick with desktop drives if I don't actually need a portable drive? [more inside]
Montreal for a long weekend
We (2 NYers in late 30s) are planning on driving up to Montreal for a long weekend the second weekend in May. What should we do/see/eat and more specific questions [more inside]
Experiences building a family without your primary partner?
Do you have experiences that you would care to share of creating a family where your romantic partner (or at least your primary partner) was not a co-parent, or at least not a major one? My partner and I disagree on the kids question, but we're curious about other models than the nuclear families we grew up in. Lots of details beyond the jump. [more inside]
April 24
Baggage “baggage” - shipping excess from CA to NZ?
Hello - seeking recommendations please for sending a box/package (likely to be the size of a medium suitcase) from California to New Zealand. It won’t be possible to send it via an airline as excess baggage. Weight could be up to around 50 lbs/23 kg (of books, clothing, misc small household objects). Cost-effectiveness and reliability more important than speed of delivery.
Need a word for my pain
I’m experiencing a new type of pain and at a loss of how to describe to my docs. I’m hoping someone has experienced something similar and knows a relevant medical term so I can communicate effectively with my doc. [more inside]
Where do I go with these toenails?
My toenails have been problematic for a few years. It started with just one of them turning white and becoming thicker. This then happened to first all toes on my right foot, and more recently the left. Right now, two nails on my left foot look healthy. The other three are thicker than they should be, soft and dull instead of shiny, and there's a small blue stripe under the big toenail. On my right foot, two nails are thickened and slightly discolored (beige). The big toenail appears loose. It's firmly attached at the base, but not so much at the top. [more inside]
Give me examples of problematic advertising images
As part of a discussion/awareness raising group, I'm going to be facilitating an exercise examining problematic advertising (from an equality or social justice perspective) . Think sexism, racist imagery, reinforcing gender norms, etc. I'm looking for more recent examples, from anywhere in the world. They need to be able to be printed and handed out (so no video). Overt or subtle welcome. If you'd rather not post it here, feel free to memail me.
Examples below the fold [more inside]
Songs with a very specific three-vignette structure
I am looking for examples of songs that follow a very specific structure: the lyrics are made up of three separate but thematically related vignettes, with the refrain explicitly articulating the conceptual message that the vignettes illustrate. [more inside]
What is Findlay toast?
I saw it in a book, presented without explanation. The context is a British mom making lower-sugar breakfasts, and the example of a good one is "Findlay toast and porridge." I know what porridge is but can't imagine what a Findlay toast is, nor can I find a recipe.
Android app for listening to podcasts, similar to Google Podcasts?
At the beginning of April, Google killed its Podcast app and moved us all over to YouTube Music. I hate it. Please recommend alternatives. [more inside]
How important is it that I see a doctor for strep?
My kid was diagnosed with strep two days ago via throat culture and is on meds. Is it important that I get swabbed too? [more inside]
What should I do after opening an attachment in a scam email
I opened an attachment in a scam email but only previewed it (I didn't download the file) and I didn't click any other links. Do I need to do anything like run a search for malware, etc.? I've heard that's only for if you download the file, give away information, or click a link. but wanted to make sure.
Tips & Recommendation for an Aspiring Leather Crafter?
I have recently developed an interest in getting into leather crafting. I don't think I'll ever want to become an actual cobbler, but I would like to make some smaller, simpler things, such as leather cuffs, notebook folders, belts, tote bags. What tips and recommendations do you have for an aspiring leather crafter? What books should I read, what websites should I visit, what online and Toronto-area suppliers should I check out, and what supplies and tools will I want to acquire first?
How to *think*
If I really want to think about stuff, my modus is, I go to a bar that is 5 minutes away, there usually is a seat at the counter, I sit there, stare at the bottles, drink a beer or three and ponder whatever is troubling me at the moment. There is music, it's lively, and I just let my mind do its thing. I can not do this at home, if I just sit down on the kitchen table, or on the couch I just can't get in the mindset and I feel kind of stupid, you know, just sitting there and staring in the void. I can do it when I am lying down before sleep, but if it's 20:00 this also feels strange. Listening to music does not make it better. I think it is the stimulus rich environment that is conductive to the process. I can think of other venues to do this but they are not dependably available, or near, when the need arises (usually after kid and wife are in bed or otherwise occupied). I guess most people do some mindless task or art or something, but I find I get easily absorbed in such activities . I don't know if walking around would work. So where and how do you *think*?
ThinkPad T470 suddenly shutting down at random
I got my current ThinkPad laptop around 2020 and have never had any issues with it. Yesterday it started just randomly shutting down with no warning. I ran Lenovo Vantage and double-checked to make sure everything (BIOS, drivers, Windows updates) are all up to date. I ran scans with Lenovo Vantage that found nothing off. Starting yesterday the laptop tray will show the battery immediately displaying 100% charged to 0% charged and will flicker back and forth between 0% and 100%. Just ran Lenovo Vantage battery diagnostics which are currently showing "the primary battery is not detected." [more inside]
What factors go into admission for a visiting year?
You are in admissions, or know people in admissions at a graduate or especially law school. What factors, including internal, have caused you or others to admit or deny an applicant for a visiting/transient year? [more inside]
Why am I suddenly hungry in the mornings?
YANMD, etc. I don't typically feel any hunger in the mornings, and I haven't eaten breakfast regularly since I was in high school (I'm now in my 50s). My usual routine is two cups of coffee with non-dairy creamer and sugar substitute. But all of a sudden, during the last month or so, I feel hungry almost as soon as I wake up. What gives? [more inside]
Dermatology Filter - Are these spots concerning?
YANMD - should I be concerned with these spots (whitish, flaky) on my wrists and lower legs? I have a history of eczema.
Good brand of buddy straps for fingers?
I have to buddy wrap two of my fingers during athletic activities for the next several months. The random brands of buddy straps I’ve bought all stretch out quickly: the velcro-ish bit remains sticky but the loop around my finger becomes too large and annoying. Any recommendations for specific brands, available in the US, that don’t stretch so quickly?
How can I move all of my appointments to a co-worker's Outlook calendar?
I am leaving my job as a secretary to the Chair of an academic department. I have sent out calendar invites that go into the future and am hoping there's an easy way to transfer all of those onto my successor's calendar either in one fell swoop or one by one if needed without having to recreate them - with the end result that those invites come from her calendar and she receives the notice if somebody cancels/declines/etc. Is there a way to do this? My googlefu is failing me.
Quebec adventures! That are slow and peaceful!
Going to Quebec City in May with my elderly parents. What are some nice, easy going activities we can do? [more inside]
Californian insider info - When is Hwy1 likely to fully reopen?
We're planning a very exciting family trip from the UK to the US Pacific Coast in July-August this year. On the agenda is to drive down the PCH/Highway 1 from SF to LA stopping off in Big Sur and San Luis Obispo. But Hwy 1 is currently closed - is it safe to book accommodation now on the presumption it will reopen by August 2024? [more inside]